Do You Tell People You Love Them?

I don't usually tell people I love them except to my wife. I do see that some people say love them even though those aren't special people. I don't know the reason for that, but I only tell my wife that I love her because I do love her. I can tell she is really happy to hear that.

 

All. The. Time. I learned long ago, you might not get that chance again and all we have is right now. I make sure that people feel my appreciation for them, I'm very open about my feelings. My friends get an I love you every time we speak; a hug too and they'll usually know how proud I am of whatever it is they're doing with their lives and families at the time. I think it's one of the biggest hurdles for humans to overcome.. stop being so self centred (not in the ego way, though that's huge too) and open up a bit. People die with regrets every day and the people they love should never be a part of that.

 

Did you want to know the easiest way to get people to tell you that they love you? Get them drunk. I have to admit that seems to be the most I ever hear people utter those words to each other. Clearly, the meaning of the sentence is lost in the bubbled delights but it is the most often time & place I hear it used. Second most often? Obligatory 'I love you' between a husband and wife upon ending conversations or leaving each others presences.

I feel like the actually feeling behind saying 'I love you' is lost. There should be passion with that love. An intensity. Regardless of whom that love is toward. A family member you love should know you love them with intensity as well. I don't know. It feels like it means less today. Perhaps, that is solely my perception.

 

I tell people I love that I love them every chance I get cause you never know when you might never see that person again. So every chance I let my family kids and friends know I love them!

 

I only tell my girlfriend and family I love them. It's not something I generally say to friends though. I probably don't say it enough either, but then I think most people don't.

 

The only person I say it to is my boyfriend. I have never said it to my friends because I feel like that would be awkward. I don't say it to my family because I don't talk to my family. I do think it is important to tell people you love them, though. It is a nice thing to hear.

 

I tell most people who I am close to that I love them every time I talk to them. This is mostly people in my family or people I may not see or talk to every day. I also tell my fiancee I love him pretty much every day.

 

I'm used to being around church people who spend a lot of time saying "I love you". I remember Sister Annie Mae at 90 greeting everyone with a very bosomy hug (like everybody's favorite grandmother) and a "I love you, Jesus loves you" that would make Madalyn O'Hare a believer. Most of my friends say it. Then, we are from the South.

 

Love is a strong word. To the people that matter the most to me and are my life, I will tell them when I have the chance otherwise I won't say it to anyone. It's genuine when you only say it to a select few people and people know how they make you feel which is awesome! Life is short so it's good to say it every chance you have.

 

This is also how we are in our family. Every visit and phone call ends with "I love you." Like others have said, you never know if that will be the last thing they ever hear from you. As for telling it to friends, it depends on how close of a friendship you have with the person. I was going through a really tough time a while back, and I had a supervisor at work tell me, "I love you and want you to know that I'm here if you need anything." Her saying that to me made such a difference at a time when I really needed to feel some support. Words have a lot of power, and I don't think we realize the difference we can make in someone's life with just a few simple words!

 

I am used to telling people I LOVE them but it all depends on various things. Once someone does really a great thing to me I always appreciate their concern by telling them I love them. Additionally every time I visit my parents the first thing i tell them is i LOVE them. I also frequently tell my girlfriend I LOVE her. Besides all that I as well ensure i tell my little brother I love home every time we meet as it makes him feel love and more appreciated.

 

YES. You have to. Life is too short without them knowing that you love them.

 

I do, but only when I really mean it. I have known some phony people who say it to manipulate people or get things from people. I say it to people I genuinely love.

 

Yes, I tell people I love them all the time. I have to mean it though. Usually this phrase is reserved for people really close to me such as my significant other or close family members. It's not a term I throw around lightly. I have to mean it to say, in all instances.

 

I like this question. But anywho, I rarely say I love you. The only person that I have ever really said it to and meant it was my older sister. I tell her I love her on a regular basis, whether it be as she is leaving our house to go home, or me leaving her house, or our conversation on the phone has ended. Sometimes she will say it and I don't say it back because I am not in the mood to be gushing love and all of that. But she knows that I do. But most of the time when she says it, I will say it back or I will say it first.

No one else has ever heard me tell them that I love them. I don't love anyone else. Everyone else pisses me off lol.

 

It took me a long time to drop the guy stigma thing. Guys do not do this or that and that included voicing any emotion that was connected to love. If you genuinely love someone, it is a great thing to let them know. I hate no one. There are a lot of people I do not like, but I hate no one. So, even if it is someone I have just met and looks like they need a little encouragement, I do not mind telling them that I love them........and so does God.

 

The whole guy thing that you are referring to is commonly referred to as 'toxic masculinity,' in feminist circles. Your post further validates that it is a real thing. It is so bad and sad how society conditions boys into believing that they are boys first, and not actual human beings with a full set of emotions. This is mostly enforced by the misogynistic society that we live in. It is no wonder that men's suicide rate is so high, because emotions are a big part of life. Locking them up and not expressing them not only makes a person boring and one dimensional - not mysterious in my opinion lol - but it'll cause harm to ones health too.

Toxic masculinity is perhaps one of the main reasons why I'm a lesbian and mostly only have gay male friends. So much more to play with where women are concerned. The boxes that men put themselves in are way too restrictive. My cousin is an example: I've tried to have open and honest conversations with him before, and he kind of just evades the emotional questions. It is so annoying, and I'm often so bored and frustrated I just want to shoot myself. He doesn't act this way because he cannot, but because he has been conditioned by society to think that he cannot - to think that showing emotions is weak, and or gay behavior. The whole thing is ridiculous.

 

I think this is true in many cases, but I think it's more a problem in certain places than the human population in whole lol. Yes, we're treated differently in general.. that's totally got to stop, but I see progress there in a big way. The emotional thing though.. ugh. I've always had the feeling and a few experiences to back up my thoughts, but now that I frequent forums on a regular basis, I see it is absolutely true. Parenting seems to be massively different depending where you are and especially connection to the children. Treated more as property than their own human beings with feelings that need to be respected. I see a BIG difference in how parents talk about their kids, for example, in the states vs Canadians. I can usually see where many of the issues being griped about come from to begin with. It doesn't take long to take a population's majority parenting and connect it to certain issues plaguing the whole country as well lol. But I digress. My point is, I see it very rarely these days. At least where I'm from. And come to think of it, I've never been with someone who had a hard time expressing their emotions or love, so it's definitely not a new thing. Not that I've been with an entire population to be able to say it's a fact lol.

 

Of course. Parenting has a LOT to answer for where the perpetuation of toxic masculinity is concerned, as well as a whole host of other issues that plague both men and women. The kind of conditioning that any one child receives does depend on what part of the world the child is from - as conditioning seems to vary as you go from culture to culture. Maybe you are just good at picking men. But most of the men that I come into contact with think - in some capacity - that crying or expressing their emotions makes them weak, when the opposite makes them weak in my opinion. Emotions are so natural. It is mind-boggling to me that one could condition people to condemn them. Most of the men, except for a lot of the gay ones anyway. I do have one gay friend who isn't very emotional, but he makes up for that by expressing himself in other ways. He's expressive.

My sister's boyfriend is another example. He just sits there, and very rarely expresses himself. I get so bored around him. I don't even feel like filling the silences, so we both just sit there is silence half the time. I have tried, but our personalities just don't tally up. I honestly cannot believe that my sister is attracted to him. I'm always like, what the hell are you seeing in this guy? I don't say it to her, but I think it. And I know that part of the thing that she is attracted to is that 'male' lack of emotion - almost disinterest. But then again I have been told that he is a lot different when it is just him, my sister, and their kids so...